Why think?

I type this post as I set my phone aside after watching the movie Sara’s. The film does not call out anything we haven’t already heard of before but emphasizes listening to this time.

#spoileralert #notamoviereview #notapaidpost

Sara’s is a Malayalam movie available on Amazon Prime. The storyline is simple. It is of a woman who chooses not to have children. But is it that simple?

Though she gets married to someone on the same page as her on this matter, life happens, society happens, and things take a turn. However, I loved that the authenticity of the topic was maintained throughout while highlighting the key points.

  • A woman has to be mentally and physically prepared to give birth and raise a child. We often miss the mental readiness part.
  • Just because a woman is physically capable of conceiving and does not have medical issues stopping her from doing so does not mean she has to.
  • Some might say she will learn to deal when she has a child in hand. Unfortunately, that is not how the mind works. What is left is a forced relationship that consciously or subconsciously impacts the child and the mother.
  • But what about when she gets old, if she has a child, they will look after her. The statement is unsettling as it creates a necessity out of a fearful need and not out of a willing want. Adds undue pressure on the child as they grow with misrepresented expectations from them- a traditional barter system of unwilling emotions.

Childbirth has been a sensitive matter over the years, and this is not propaganda to say for it or against it. It is to say that whether a woman chooses to give birth or not, it should purely be out of her own choice.

The actor who plays a doctor in the movie says this well – Better not to be a parent than be a bad parent.

We often misunderstand that a relationship is toxic or abusive only on clear physical indications or explicit verbal statements.

Children are bright, and they catch any subtle negativity we feel we pushed off under the rug and made it unnoticeable.

So, next time you hear a woman make a choice, do not push your insecurities on her or make her feel guilty for making that choice. What might work for you might not work for others. And, that is OK.

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